Today I had a sonogram of our little bundle of joy. To most at this point seeing your little one brings on the greatest joy ever, I am at 31 weeks. For me today there was such a mixture of sadness along with that joy. It started the moment I walked into the little room that they do the sonograms in. The song playing was Love Me Like Jesus does, which is enough to get the tears flowing, but the knowledge that the last time we had walked in there Shane and I were together with my Momma, so excited to see if we were having a boy or girl. I remembered seeing his face when we found out that Zoey was in fact a girl, he was so disappointed, but got over that very quickly and was talking about needing a bigger truck to haul HIS girls around in very shortly after.
Today also marks one month since the accident, which definitely didn't do much to bring on the happy. I cried, and cried, and cried. When I saw that little heart beat going it brought on a fresh wave of tears. Shane would have been so excited to see how chunky she is, that she is growing so well, and he would have asked just to see if there were magically boy parts, lol. If just seeing the sonogram brings on this kind of emotion, I can only imagine what its going to be like when I hold her in my arms. This tiny creation that we made together, another part of him.
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