It is almost 2015. In 2 short days a new year will begin. I feel it will be one of change and happiness. Because in 2014 I remembered what it is to be happy. Holidays were still hard, that's a given though. I found what it is to love again, my opinions on marrying again have definitely changed, as have my opinions on having more children... It is odd what a year and half can do.
In May I decided to finally go on a date. A real one, not just friends going out. That date led to a short lived, but, needed relationship. It taught me that Love can exist again. That you can open your heart and start thinking about a future with another person. That, my friends is the biggest bit of forward progress anyone can make when placed in a situation like mine. Though it ended, it taught me a lot. He was a good guy, just not the "commitment" able type. You live, you learn, and then you continue moving forward.
Forward for me took a bit, I went looking for a bit of fun. I found out that my bit of fun is someone I want to spend a long long time with. I am happy with that, he is wonderful. He understands me, even when I go dark, he finds my light and brings it back out.
I still love Shane, there will never be a moment that I can deny that. But, your heart can feel whole again. The emptiness can fade. Love can make that happen.
Here's to you 2014, let us make 2015 even better.
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